Reason number a zillion and two . . .

. . . why I'm glad to be Catholic.

The Holy Father hasn't allowed himself to be mau-maued into giving an insincere apology to the Mohammedan fanatics who (let's face it) proved Manuel II Palelogos's point by committing violence in the name of their religion.

How dare you say my religion is violent? I WEEL KEEL YOU!

Nothing more need be said. Benedict is a true blessing.

Heard at Temple

So did you hear the one about George W. Bush and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad?

Ahmadinejad calls up W and says, "George, you won't believe the dream I had. I just had to call you and tell you about it."

W says, "What did you dream?"

"I dreamed I saw banners in Farsi and English all over Washington, DC and New York City, and people cheering in the streets."

"What did the banners say?"

"They said, 'United States of Iran.'"

"Well, I'm glad you called," says W, "because I had a dream about you too."

"What did you dream?"

"I dreamed I saw people dancing for joy in the streets of Teheran, and they were holding up banners and signs too."

"What did the banners say?"

"I don't know," says W. "I can't read Hebrew."